It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.
- CHARLES DARWIN
How we change… and so often and much in only a single lifetime.
This is clearest when we look at our heroes -- our public icons -- our human torches.
Take the recently deceased high-pitched, crotch-grabbing, energetic pop star that went from being deified to being demonized in a matter of years… and now he is put to rest by a world transfixed with ambiguous feelings and unanswered questions.
Time and again, we see our war heroes and redeemers turn into tyrants. People from humble beginnings become billionaires. Many times we see the good guys give up. Many times we see evil extinguished by conscience.
People have the capacity to live as saints or villains and shift from one personality to the other with relative ease. We have this as a free gift and a harsh responsibility. We determine our truth by our individual choices and our reputation by our habits.
In our own lives, we encounter extremes of transformation… a once funny uncle who just stopped laughing… a friend with whom you once burned the phone line for ten straight hours who just chose to become a complete stranger… a person you once feared who now serves as your role model…
The weak become strong… the dull become colorful… the meek become loud… the arrogant are humbled… the evil finds redemption… and the heroes fall with greed.
Transformation is inevitable. Change is who we are because we constantly seek for that which we do not have. We long to live someone else’s life. We are fascinated by the unfamiliar. We are drawn towards the unknown.
Never mind if we have it all and no apparent right to envy others. The truth is… we always will.
The prince will always have recurring dreams of being the pauper and vice versa a million times over.
But every now and then, we find true rocks in our lives… people who serve as the solid foundations unto which we cling for safety… people who shift and sway, and sometimes leave but always return.
These people shield us from the chaos. They help us find our center and stay on a predictable course, and they will live and die with us through any transformation.
They are the keepers.
They are home.
… and they are the ones we often fail to notice… because with them, we are safe.
After all the excitement... after all the adventure... after all the changes... we always come home. Always.
Published in Cebu Gold Star Daily
Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
- BILL COSBY
It doesn’t take a professional therapist to know that humor is one of the finest coping mechanisms that the human animal has ever had the good fortune of learning.
Filipinos, more than any other people in my limited experience, have the greatest wealth of humor and its appreciation at their disposal (at par with the Latin Americans, probably). When we dislike what we see around us, our primary reflex is to ridicule it with comments, posters, skits, funny text messages, blogs, YouTube videos, Twitter statuses, and even TV commercials.
Humor is a cool way of telling the truth without being too emotionally transfixed in its ugliness. As a modest people, this is our chosen method of communication, allowing us to avoid the risk of judgment or rejection. We joke about things we casually and instinctively cannot talk about, especially the big four: money, sex, politics, and religion. It makes life easier to take in and our ideas easier to let out.
Knowing who and how we are today, it’s not hard to imagine the Katipuneros of olden times bursting into laughter after one of their members let out a non-so-quiet fart during one of their solemn strategic meetings.
It’s not difficult to think about Dr. Rizal laughing at the funny accents of his fellow Illustrados in Europe while giving their fiery speeches during one of their many dinner parties.
It is not far-fetched to picture Lapu-Lapu's warriors pointing and laughing hysterically at the flamboyantly dressed Spanish soldiers as they landed on the shores of Mactan Island, just before their deadly skirmish.
Humor makes us a malleable people that will not snap with the harsh daily pressures. It doesn’t mean we take nothing seriously – only that our understanding and acceptance of the things we see, hear and experience is cautious and cushioned by a filter of laughter.
We have never had a superior army against a foreign power. So our foreparents scampered away like vermin only to strike again at the next opportune time. A humorless lot cannot pull that off and sustain it for many months at a time.
We never had the wealth of our neighbors, and so we are forced to find riches in our imagination. Without humor, many of us would have jumped off our many cliffs or hung ourselves under our many trees.
We are fortunate in our ability to detach from the material world and appreciate the best in any situation. We are strong in our ability to sidestep danger and dodge pain. We are wise in our ability to search for the truth without emotionally overheating. This is how we survive.
Because of all these, in spite of all the frustrations, and regardless of all the insecurities, we are still one of the happiest people on Earth.
Published in Cebu Gold Star Daily
The disembodied spirit is immortal; there is nothing of it that can grow old or die. But the embodied spirit sees death on the horizon as soon as its day dawns.
- THOMAS HOBBES (1588 - 1679)
For those of us who work with the law, we often think in terms of finality. We believe ourselves to be boxed in by parameters set by old men and women who seem all-knowing of all there is and all there ever will be. Our education implies that outside this box we call the Rule of Law, there is no other form of succor. But any person with a bit of life experience knows that there are forces greater than government, institutions, and people. There are virtues far greater than the decent human minimums of justice and fairness.
This holy week, I invite everyone to reflect on the greater things in life -- more than our business interests, our personal ambitions, and our dreams. These are the greater forces of compassion, kindness, and love -- super-natural urges that seem to always keep us off tangent from normal human behavior and reasoning. Why are we capable of being generous at a time of personal need? Why are we able to reach out and pull up those we fairly defeat in life’s race? Why do we still believe in miracles after all that education we’ve been put through?
There exists that great force that keeps humanity reaching out for its best qualities. Whether you are Christian, Muslim, Jew, Buddhist or even a self-declared atheist, there is reason and meaning behind every good work that you do and reprieve from your baser actions. The inevitable truth is that we are all spiritual beings and no denial, no backsliding, no distancing mechanism can change that.
Whatever may be your interpretation, there will always be room for greater things and greater ideas in your life. Call it God, goodness or love; we recognize it almost immediately when we see it. We are forever drawn towards it in our search for meaning.
Sometimes your cynicism may leak out through your words, but your actions will always betray the truth. How hard you work for your family will show it. How you comfort a friend at a time of loss will show it. How you tip the cab driver or the waiter will show it. How you call people through your mobile phone for no reason except to say “How’s it going?” will show it. How you forgive someone who took much from you or betrayed you in the most terrible way will show it.
These things are who we are. These things fuel our hope.
Our failures, our pains, our frustrations fade in time because we are spiritual beings, mindful of things more important than simply what we go through this day. We are a constant work-in-progress and will remain this way until the day we die. This is our common journey towards perfection – towards the spirit.
Thus, we are not of this world. We will never be satisfied with what we have now because they lock us up in this place so fleeting and temporary. That bigger TV or faster car will become old and meaningless in time. Your clothes and jewelry will go out of style. Your gadgets will become obsolete and stop working. Your beauty will fade. Relationships will end, whether by choice or by death. Everything has an expiration date.
So survey your blessings. Value the good things in your life because all these are temporary: our careers, our material things, and our loved ones. Someday, we will lose them. Someday, only shadows and memories of the good old days will remain. But even on those days, we will survive. Through any war, recession, heartbreak or frustration, we will survive. Because at the end of every episode of pain, after every loss and even when everything else fades into wind, the human spirit remains.
Peace and blessings to you all. Happy Easter!
Published in Cebu Gold Star Daily
New Year for me has always been my birthday. This year, I took my usual cup of early morning coffee and ended up half praying and half talking to myself. It was a long week and work was beginning to become that burden, which makes me doubt my capacity as a doer. When you work for more than ten hours each day, things begin to spin beyond your control and from this vertigo, sleep becomes your only reprieve.
For the last few days, I have been complaining to myself during my 45-minute bus ride home, “There has to be a better way”. I know I share this sentiment with most of the working class out there, but it personally bore upon me, the same. Then, during one of these trips, I went into observer mode and discovered how truly fortunate I am to be where I am and to be doing what I do. I see the tired old lady collecting bus stubs, wondering how little pay she gets, how many children she has to provide for, how many hours she has to work each day and how utterly dehumanizing her job is. I see the street sweepers, the traffic police, the peanut vendor, the newspaper boys, the postman – all these people work day and night with little thanks and without even being greeted by a smile and a “good morning”.
I may not be earning much this day, but I’m doing fine when set against my daily background and the populace through which I navigate. I get to be creative in my work although it might wear me down at times. I get to talk to my co-workers, laugh about hard times and talk about my dreams. I get to sit in a comfortable chair, a full desk and work in a room with air-conditioning and good lighting. I dare not take these things for granted and run the risk of thinking that I’m so much more entitled than everyone else. I may be so much more fortunate… but that is all there is to it.
This year, I ask for a humility that never runs dry. I pray for the ability to always acknowledge that there is something far greater than myself and there are people relying on me to do my job. That although the hard work that I pump into my creations is my own, the very capacity and opportunity to do such work are gifts designed and handed to me by my Creator. So I claim these gifts completely and along with them, the responsibility of making them grow and of aiming them at the very best goals within my sights.
This is going to take a little getting used to. But I am grateful to have work at a time of scarcity. I am grateful for the chance to meet new people everyday when I have already been generously blessed with friends and family of true measure and substance. I am grateful for everything good that has happened to me, and everyone who has taken me to this point. It is this gratitude that keeps my demons in their cages.
Last night, my boss called me up, greeted me a happy birthday and thanked me for a job well done.
As I took the bus to work this morning, I thought, “It was a good first week”.
Originally published in Cebu Gold Star Daily, Vol. 1, No. 99, p. 6 (January 16, 2009, Friday)
I begin my duties here at Gold Star by explaining what my column is all about. The French existentialist Jean-Paul Sartre once taught, “We have no choice but to be free”. It might sound like an oxymoron at first look, but it actually makes good sense. Freedom is not a choice but condition that is placed upon us as rational beings. We are not free to choose or reject our freedom. It is this freedom that capacitates us to navigate through the vast ocean of goods, evils and debatable gray areas in life. To the human person, freedom appears to be like a purely desirable gift, but it is also a tremendous responsibility that we need to guard against our own weaknesses. Free choices range from miniscule events like choosing which coffee beans to grab from the grocery store to colossal steps like whether or not to send young soldiers to fight in a foreign land.
In this short life, we spend most of our time trying to acquire wealth and power. In the right hands, these can be genuine instruments of freedom. Wealth can be used to create industries that provide quality goods and services to the people. This, in turn, creates jobs and livelihood for people who would otherwise have nothing. Power can be used to effect proper change and influence the movers in society to follow a desired path. It can be used to fight for a cleaner environment, better living conditions, greater productivity and a great many goods that can be brought about by a single nudge of power.
On the duller side, power and wealth can be used for purely selfish reasons -- reasons that ignore the human condition and rot the soul. This spiritual cancer is one we see too often in today’s world. Relationships become equated with material gifts and quality of life is mistaken for one’s bank statement. I don’t pretend to imply that enjoying the fine things in life is an evil. I enjoy a good cup of gourmet coffee as much as the next guy. But our patterns of behavior and consumption must be a means to better living rather than an end to itself. We ought to strive for quality over quantity – satisfaction over accumulation.
In a place and time where wealth and opportunities are scarce, we always need to come to terms on a daily basis with the choice of either fending for ourselves or to aiding those in dire situations. We are faced with the challenge of overcoming our baser instincts of survival to live in a higher plane of existence as rational and compassionate human beings. This is the cost of our freedom -- responsibility over our own circles of influence, never cowering from these difficult but necessary decisions. We are free and we have no choice but to be free -- no other choice but to face the chain of consequences that our actions bear. We can choose to add to the suffering or to supply reprieve.
This is our challenge. And it is only right that we grab a chance to review our lives and what we’ve done with our gifts, our wealth and our power. When we use them the way they ought to be used, we create meaning. We transform work into love and power into inspiration. We become people worth imitating – people that others can be proud of.
So this brand new year can be our opportunity to look into the recent past and see how many lives we’ve improved including our own. Did we act as animals or as human being free from our own destructive tendencies? Every day is a chance to be better than who you were yesterday. And that is all we really need to do to be truly free.
Cheers to a wonderful 2009.
Just got home from my usual urban immersion... and as usual it felt great and terrible at the same time.
Anyway, I finally got to check my phone and there I saw a message from a friend who has been long absent: "Why do I have the feeling that I don't deserve the person I'm with right now?"
Talk about "out of the blue"... but I indulged:
"We deserve nothing. The best you can do is try and be content with what you have."
Indeed, we deserve nothing. Not our jobs, our significant others, our friends, our families, our material graces or our skills.
I went through five years of law school to learn these ideas of justice, equity, fairness and proportionality... but in the end, you realize that all these are just ideas and ideals of such artificial value and character that an extra ounce of critical thinking only leaves us befuddled and trapped in the place where were before: helplessness.
Fairness is not a naturally occuring thing. We never get what we deserve. It's either too good for us or not good enough. Absolute equilibrium is mathematically and realistically impossible. And so, we as free agents try to bridge the gap. We try harder... we work for it so that somehow, we might approximate the propriety of the web of rewards and punishments that orbit our lives.
When we were young children, we were taught to "make things fit". I remember this old toy of mine which had differently-shaped blocks and a plastic tub that had the corresponding hole-shapes on it. The task was to make the triangular block fit into the triangular hole and so on... easy enough right? And so we have been conditioned to understand exactness... to conform to these shapes and sizes and characteristics so that all may be well... problem is, we later learn to apply these assumptions to people as well.
Whenever we see this less-than-presentable dude rest his arm around this lovely lady, an alarm immediately goes off in our head saying "NO!!!"... and we often rationalize it by thinking "He must have some killer wheels" or "He must be dynamite in bed"... and it never occurs to us that this mismatch is the most natural thing of all. We always think that pretty people should be with pretty people and the ugly should stick with the ugly... and so the shapes-and-holes exercise works wonders...
Is it fair? No it is not. But so is the rest of the world. Fairness is an abstract idea that keeps us in line. The Universe has been playing this joke on us all our lives and we don't even bother to question it. We are sucked into romanticism and other forms of mind-control and we use them to cope with the harshest form of reality: life is unfair.
Sure, we love hearing writers and musicians say that "there's always someone out there for every single one of us"... wrong! That's just bullshit, my friends. And you know it. Some of us have had 4, 7, 9, or even 14 relationships in our lives and we don't even give it a second thought... millions of people have lived up to the age of 40 or even 60 without ever knowing the touch of another's hand. The truth is that some people have all the fun... Some people die alone.
We love to dream... we love to hope... but one thing's for certain... it's all unfair... and our ever-changing perception of what's fair isn't helping at all... and as we grow older, our minds start to compromise and we lower our standards more and more that we end up with nothing worth keeping.
So what's there to do about it?
If you want something, just take it. Don't wait for the world to give it to you because it's not gonna happen. It's going to be unfair in any given case, so just take it. If you take it, it's yours... if you don't do anything about it, then maybe you just don't want it enough. If it slips away, then tough luck. You just have to deal with it.
That's all there is to it. Justice will not find you. You just have to make things happen.
Originally published in the March 2008 Issue of ThePalladium -- in my column Legal Personality.
As a super-senior, I can't help but reach back into my immediate past to try and draw out a cumulative meaning that will somehow justify this long-overdue end. After years of leafing through thousands of pages of often-incomprehensible text and braving hundreds of hours of humiliation, terror and disappointment, I finally see the finish line in the short distance -- a sight that gets sweeter every day. And just as we were taught always to begin with the end in mind, it's equally important to end reflective of everything that had been.
Roughly a week before I descended into the hell that was Intro to Law, my dad gave me an elegant wooden Ingraham table clock, and on its face was an inscription that read:
One Day at a Time
Help me believe in what I could be, and all that I am.
Show me the stairway I have to climb,
Lord, for my sake, teach me to take one day at a time.
This is a prayer that I see twice every single day: Once when I wake up to prepare for the day and a second time as I wind up my affairs for the night. And it helped. It allowed me to take one piece of the puzzle at a time from the manifold parts of the law and reassemble them inside my head, albeit often with much difficulty. Law school has consistently pushed me against the walls of my own personal limits and I found myself repeatedly tearing them down just to make it through another exam—another semester—another year. I admit I was never as smart as my classmates. But by some grace, my academic destiny is all but complete.
In any case, law school is not just a lengthy exercise in intellectual sadomasochism, but it carries with it gifts of immeasurable value. One such gift is an extension of our youth. Most of us have been attending school our entire lives, and these extra four years give us an excuse to delay growing up. It gives us a chance to keep holding on to our ideals and our innocence up to the last possible moment. Indeed, to the casual outside observer, a law class would appear to be nothing more than a group of older, better-dressed high school students in action. Even our professors encourage this through their comical antics and shameless commentaries while discussing constitutional concepts like Stop-and-Frisk or family case law like Chi Ming Tsoi v. CA. In spite of all the pain involved, law school can be quite amusing. It's one huge carnival –- an attractive nuisance, if you will. Law school teaches us to be critical of all things brought before us, and this philosophy is always attended with humor and wit.
Another gift that law school affords us is the chance to clarify who we truly are. Many of us found ourselves in law school either because we couldn't get work that pays well enough or because we haven't made a career choice just yet. And long before even considering law school, we were writers, activists, artists, musicians, athletes and many other things that have nothing to do with legal education. To some people, law school is a reason enough to abandon these skills and passions for the much-needed additional study time. For others, this is simply unacceptable. These are the same people who join organizations in and outside school to find some semblance of normalcy in their lives—to say that law school is not the be-all and end-all of who I am as a person. We have law students who compete in sports or performance arts locally and internationally. We have writers who have penned brilliant pieces of literature, both outside and inside the legal spectrum. We have students who volunteer with charity organizations to work closely with and for the poor. All these is, to my mind, the Magis that we always keep hearing about: the more—the lingering discontent with the world and the corollary desire to always push it further towards goodness. Our character is built by the things that we pursue with fervor alongside the tests of academic life.
In the end, there are many people to thank: our mentors, our friends and even those who just love giving us a hard time. They all build up our character. I was a legal tabula rasa when I entered the Rockwell campus and I will be leaving it dramatically stronger and wiser than I was then.
Last Christmas, my dad gave me a beautiful silver Breitling wristwatch. I wear it proudly after several years of not having any watch at all and relying on my mobile phone for the time. This time, there were no inscriptions or prayers on its face. But I felt that it was my old man's way of saying "It is time."
End with the beginning in mind.
Dean CLV once said that being in law school is like going to your death. You have to allow your old self to die in the process so that a a new you can rise from the ashes (or something to that effect... exaggerations mine).
With one week of classes to go, I can't help notice that the final traces of the pre-resurrection ashes around me are being wisped away by even the slightest draft.
Five years ago, here stood a man who was ready to enter a lifetime commitment and be a father. That man became broken, bitter and angry because of the loss of those dreams. His jealousy and hatred resonated throughout his little universe but he never said a word. The worst part was that he was already in law school. His grades had suffered a blow he would never recover from as everything was a mess inside him... emotional cancer had struck and there seemed to be no way out of it... and as the demons seemed to take everything from him, he prayed that he would be removed from this cursed place forever... this was not to be...
The heavens opened a window... one that would allow the man to expand his universe slowly so that the cancer would be isolated in the old areas... and so he took it... to escape what he has become with a hope of becoming something totally different. That window was called the Ateneo Human Rights Center... and this would soon become part of the triangle that was his new universe. It was here where he learned that the only way to start becoming whole again was to expel all that negativity. He focused more on what he could do for other people to distract him from the crashing tides inside him. Fortunately, he was never alone in this task. He found kindred souls and fellow lost spirits in the trenches. It was the summer of 2004 and the curing process was terrible and slow... but it it did happen... and because of this, he was not only healed but transformed into something totally different. He would stay for four more years, loving the work and the people involved in it. This was the work that blessed him with a chance to take his first trip to the West and shrink the world in his mind. This also helped him to find the greatest friends he could ever ask for in his life... and a continuing source of people of that same quality and caliber.
And in the process another window opened: The man started writing music once more. After having abandoned a dream for almost eight years, he just picked up his guitar and wrote what he felt. This became the second part of his current universe: Music. On that same summer of 2004, a more experienced musician friend came to Manila and called the man up... said he wanted to hang out. The man obliged and the talk turned into a jamming session after the man told his musician-friend about some material he was working on. In a single evening, the veteran and the rookie were able to record two songs of amazing quality on a beat-up PC. The rest is history, the band Sundown Caffeine would be born a few months later at a psuedo-Mexican bar in his hometown of Cebu City and the music would go on to be not just a source of amusement, but a viable career path for the two (not so) young men.
So what's the third part of the triangle?
It's family. The past, the existing and the future. The beginning and end of all that we do and all that we work for. This is a point in time when such an elusive dream has to be cast aside, at least partially. You want your own family and your own home but you have to get there first... and though you keep repeating the words to yourself that "there's no rush"... you realize deep inside that you wont be in this waking world much longer and that your present family will probably outlive you by several years. Perhaps you've accepted that you end up dead without ever knowing that sensation. Perhaps living vicariously through your brothers and sisters will do the trick. In any case, this leg will have to be set aside...
I've been walking on two legs for years... why should it be a problem now?
A few days more and I will face my final recitation, my final classroom session, my final hours of detention in the necessary evil that is the formal education system.
CLV was right. My death is almost complete. Entering law school was perhaps the best mistake I ever made in my life. And if could talk to the me five years ago, I'd tell him to brave it out... because things are really going to be alright.
_____
And so it's time.
I walk out that door with no regrets... only honest mistakes.
And I will walk with two legs for now, if only to carry a steeled heart.
My death is almost complete.
So you feel the alcohol and the smoke have settled down -- transformed into noxious colorless vapours -- your dreams that brought you close enough have been ripped open once more for the coming of the waking world. Water. More water.
The somber tones outside leave little doubt about where you are right now. The guitar cables are tangled and your phone's battery pack is screaming death.
Why fix what isn't broken? Why make carvings upon the clean smooth finish? Why complicate things that ought not to be when you're so close to the end? (an end).
Perhaps because I've lived a little too long without it. Time zips past you when you're not really paying attention. And this time it did and I wasn't. It dawns on you that as long as it stays out of your reach, it depreciates into mere memory, then history, then myth and finally a mere concept. How easy it is to dismiss other people's problems with parenthood statements and condescending "been-there-done-that" advice when you deal with mere concepts.
But it's not just some abstract concept that anyone can just master. There is no master. We are slaves because we submit our freedoms for its disposal. Is it a bad thing? Not really. The initial freedom to enter it and the sustaining freedom to dwell in it are always there. But along the road, we twist and tumble, we dive and lift off, we shape and mold, we change our course into a bleak grey area called compromise. Individuals die. And we see something ultimately more powerful emerge.
I am tired as I wake up. It's no concept. After the songs and lyric fragments that flood my mind and hard drive, I seemed to have lost sight of the very meaning of it all. Yes. Meaning. It's not truth that we search for because truth is amoral and inhumanly neutral. What we want is meaning. The type that gets you up when you don't want to. The type that makes you walk under the rain and look up and clench your fists as a smile curves up your face. The type that causes you be both impatient and terrified about the very next day when you know you'd just wake up sober again only re-enter the cycle of self-destruction.
It's not just a concept because it has to be necessarily trapped and incarnated by context. Particular who-what-where-and-when's surround you and you have to act within these parameters. And yes, it's inconvenient. Square one always is. It's full of anxiety and empty of confidence. How much truth are you willing to give and how much is enough so that meaning can be drawn from it without flooding another's life? How much unchange can you tolerate and how much of change can you offer? It freaks you out because you know in your mind that you will suffer -- and suffer again. But sometimes, the thanatos does come -- the human desire for pain and death -- and we embrace it... perhaps because death gives us a chance to mirror our lives and see that we don't have to do all this alone.
You need a walk. Think, though you grow sick of it.
It's square one and you're in the context.
Originally published in ThePalladium December 2007 (Vol. 4, Issue 3), released on December 17, 2007. This article was written for my column Legal Personality.
A prophet has no honor in his own country.
- JESUS CHRIST from John 4:44
It was in grade school where I was first taught of this phenomenon called ‘Brain Drain’ in my Civics and Culture class. At first, I was just amused that social terminology could rhyme like that, but as my teacher started to explain what it was and how it was a national evil, I felt the seeds of dissent start to grow inside me, staying my tongue as my mind yelled, “So what?” If people can find their creative destinies away from their country of birth, why stop them? I didn’t know it then, but I was already advocating human self-determination to myself.
Coined by the Royal Society of London in the 1950’s, ‘Brain Drain,’ also known as ‘Human Capital Flight’ is the widespread emigration of highly-skilled, highly-educated or highly talented people to other countries or territories because their own is unwilling or unable to sustain their wants and needs. This is caused by war, famine, poverty, disease, lack of opportunity or any other reason that would impel an intelligent person to seek refuge elsewhere.
Brain drain has been happening everywhere in the world from the very beginning of human existence. When we hear of migration, we remember the Ice Age, the Exodus from Egypt, the European Slave Trade, the India-Pakistan Exchange, and here, close to our hearts, the flight of the Filipino people to every possible habitable place in the globe. These people were compelled to leave by a force that was much greater than themselves. In the Ice Age, it was probably because of the lack of mammoth meat or the search for less ice-age-like climates. During the Exodus, it was the promise of a prophet to lead them to a land of milk and honey that pushed them forward. The Africans came to Europe to fuel its economy because they pretty much had no choice at the end of a musket’s barrel. In India and Pakistan, people have moved around because of religious intolerance and violence between the Hindus and the Muslims of that region. And for the Philippines, well, there are as many reasons for leaving as there are people.
People will always want a better life for themselves and their families. This is human nature and it stems from our instinct to survive. Some people however go through the motions of everyday life with one meal a day and voice out no complaint. These people seem to have resigned themselves to accepting their lot and life and justify it with superstitious ideas of bad luck and misfortune. Their human spirit is broken by a long, long series or combination of social evils that often begin with poor governance. Not only do we have bad living conditions, we don’t have them at all. All we really have are conditions for survival. There is very little room for growth in this country.
On the other hand, we have these highly educated, highly-trained and highly-skilled people who realize all these terrible social ills and the sooner they realize it, the sooner they make that visit to the immigration office. Filipinos who dream big often long to leave the insular and barrio-tic way of thinking and focus on greater things like “making the world a better place” or “becoming the very best in his/her field of work”. They find that their work goes unnoticed, unappreciated and unsupported by their own communities. When this goes on consistently for too long (which is the general rule), the Filipino dreamer will have no choice but to seek for greener pastures. No matter how good, intelligent and hard-working you are, you can only be as good as the opportunities that life gives you. Is it wrong for one to live his/her only life to the very best of his/her capabilities? Is it selfish to leave the country imposed upon you by birth, to seek a country you actually choose because the people there appreciate you and allow you to grow? I think not.
In any case, it will always be our hopeful vision that the millions of Filipinos living and working abroad will look back to the islands and draw out their inherent compassion to support and encourage those who have stopped dreaming. Perhaps when conditions improve, many more people will come back and set up shop here, allowing a strong middle-class to grow. For now, our middle class is overseas. We have to accept the fact that we just cannot give what we don’t have. Wealth is not generated by kindness alone but by the sweat of men and women who are justly compensated. In a sense, our collective destiny as a Filipino people will depend upon our success as individuals, whether here or abroad.
I just don’t want to see any more Filipinos coming back for the wrong reasons, the worst being the elitist view that “Mas masarap ang buhay sa Pilipinas dahil meron kang mga katulong dun.”
What about THEIR dreams?
We have a long way to go and many attitudes to change.
Good evening friends.
A colleague of mine who has family in Lebanon emailed me last night about what happened. Five days ago, Israeli Jet fighters indiscriminately bombed Lebanon in response to the kidnapping of two of their soldiers. 60 Lebanese are dead and 150 are wounded (and my friends, the next time you read the papers and find the word wounded, this does not mean people with chicken scratches… these include people who have had their legs amputated or their eyes gouged out). Men, women, and children. No exceptions.
For those of you who are familiar with the principle of proportionality, this is definitely not it. Israel receives $3 billion in military aid from the United States every year. Their military technology is second to none. Nukes, warplanes, satellite capabilities… believe me, if you see it in the movies, the Israelis have it. Lebanon has old guns, old rockets and a few helicopters that were used during the Vietnam War. Go figure.
Many Lebanese are fleeing to neighboring countries as refugees. This happened five days ago and the fires in Lebanon have not yet been extinguished completely.
Why am I talking about a country hundreds of miles away? On the night of the 70th Anniversary of the Ateneo Law School why on Earth am I talking about war? Because, my friends, I want to clarify what we are celebrating tonight. It does not matter if we call ourselves Ateneans. It does not matter if we are Christian by name. It does not matter if we are Filipinos by birth. These things will not matter if we do not choose to be human first – if we do not feel the plight of our fellow human beings, empathize with their suffering and choose to respond accordingly. Was this not the same desire of San Ignacio and San Francisco Xavier?
I have been working with the Ateneo Human Rights Center for almost three years now and I can strongly say that these years have been the most difficult and the most precious moments of my life. My work has brought me to the mountains of Mindoro and Tarlac, to the jails of Metro Manila, to the remotest barrios of Northern Mindanao and, most recently, to the former border between East and West Germany. There are many places that need us – many voices that call upon us. There is human suffering in so many places and we have a choice on whether to respond to them or to ignore them completely.
Human rights is about facelessness. It is about extinguishing the borders and differences that make us unequal in our rights. It is about recognizing that we are all human beings complete in dignity. If you had noticed, at the start of this speech I did not greet anyone by the titles that we have grown so accustomed to: Attorney, Doctor, Professor. These are not titles of respect. These are mere titles of classification – formalities. People who address us as such do not necessarily respect us; chances are they do it out of habit or because they are expected to. These titles tell people what studies you finished not who you are. The only title that gives genuine respect is what I used to address all of you tonight: friends.
So my friends, on this 70th Anniversary, we honor our school because it has given us the opportunity to be great people. The key word here is opportunity. To say that every Atenean is great is just plain ignorance. Not every Atenean is a Bobby Gana or an Ed Nolasco. We have Ateneans who cheat on their taxes, bribe government officials, or manipulate election returns. There are Ateneans who lie, murder and rape as if they were uneducated and uncivilized. The word Atenean is, likewise, just a title that describes where you studied. Never be fooled by titles.
Our school is great because it offers us a shot at greatness. For those who choose not to take this chance, they have only themselves to blame. For those people who have taken this opportunity to become greater than mere titles, this night is for you.
How does one become great? Do what you do best no matter what it may be. We can be good at so many things but we can only be excellent in a few. Find those talents, skills or dreams you are superior in and lose yourself in them. Strive to outdo yourself every single day.
Not all of us can be Justices of the Supreme Court. Not all of us can be working for the United Nations or Amnesty International. Not all of us can be priests, pastors, imams or religious leaders. And I am very sure not all of us will turn out to be practicing lawyers.
Find your place. You may be an excellent debater… go, compete and argue your heart out. If you love books, you might want to start writing one of your own. If you excel in sports then try going pro. Every single day, we are tempted to forego the excellent for the good. So much time is wasted in doing good. Like I said, there are many people and places that need us. In this short lifetime, we just have to find where we are needed the most and stay there. We each can find our own ways of inspiring people and changing the world. Pray through the work that you do and do it with magnificent passion. That, my friends, is heroism. That is what the Atenean ought to be.
If ten or twenty years from now, you become role-models in your respective fields and someone asks you if being an Atenean had anything to do with your success. By all means say yes. But don’t forget to tell them that: Ateneo gave me the shot and I took it.
Have a good evening.
Originally published in the June 2005 edition of ThePalladium for my column Legal Personality.
Remember when you were in first grade, your teacher would always remind you: "It is wrong to steal, to cheat, to lie, to be dishonest."? Even more so for Catholic schools where the word "wrong" is effectively replaced by "a sin".
Have you ever been dishonest in your life? Are you a liar? A cheat? A thief? A criminal?
At the top of your head, it would be very easy to answer these questions with a firm "NO". You would never imagine yourself being called these degrading names – labels that only belong to those people on the streets or in prison.
Let me pose more questions closer to home: "Do you have pirated (stolen) video, music, or software CD’s in your home? Have you ever corrected a waiter who mistakenly charged you for three drinks instead of the four that you consumed? Have you ever cut into a line of people during registration or in a bank just because a friend of yours happened to be there?
Where does this kind of behavior come from when all our lives, we have been taught to love one other, to be good, honest, kind, polite, patient, respectful, obedient, responsible… and all that? Is this really the easy way out? Or can we justify this trend of dishonesty a "necessary evil" for our very survival?
We Filipinos live in the most ridiculous of circumstances. We are a first-world culture trapped in a third-world country. Everyday, we are enticed by the wonders of the modern world: mobile phones, TV’s, computers, movies, shopping malls, video games, designer clothes, signature perfumes, skin-whitening products… these things are added to our cart of "learned necessities" while our means remain less than sufficient to meet even the most basic of our "real" needs. We Filipinos constantly live in denial. We refuse to show the world that we cannot afford to enjoy these things.
So what do we do? We imitate and approximate. We create copies (though inferior) of what other people are enjoying. We try to find some semblance of satisfaction in our lives by pretending to have much more than we actually do.
An optimist would say: Then we are a creative people – Dreamers – people who are resilient and determined to find happiness even in scarcity.
A pessimist, on the other hand would remark: We are truly lost. We deny what is real and focus on the things that can never be. We are plagued by this "national delusion" that would do more damage than good.
Whenever something goes wrong, we immediately blame the government, we blame religion, our superiors, and even the weather? We have nothing but heroic expectations from other people yet we meet our own responsibilities with empty nods and phony grins. We have enough blame in our hearts to go around for the next century and, yet, many of us cannot even find peace in our own households, our barkadas, and in our own relationships.
So... how can we not be dishonest, when even the very life that we live is a lie?
What I say: We are in a place that we need to get out of soon.
